Tuesday, July 19, 2011

The Future is a Shitty Website, Loading Forever

So, it seems like every few months we've been reassuring you that something is coming soon . . . and don't worry, it is.

But I feel as though I've been neglecting the more frivolous uses of this blog. For instance, Bert just moved into the apartment that houses both me (Mez) and our practice space. I feel like we should pepper this blog with pictures of him and I and various hijinks around the apartment. Smoking bongs in our underpants, perhaps. Or would that ruin the mystique we're trying to cultivate?

Regarding that mystique, I kinda feel like we have too many websites with our name plastered on them. Walsh would no doubt agree with me, but he is a hateful man who we try and deal with through a drum set or not at all. I think Walsh would prefer if we advertised our shows and music via smoke signals.

Right now I'm trying to update our Last.fm page, because it still has stuff floating around from "Everything is Awful" on it. We also have a Songkick, which I only signed up for so that I could post upcoming shows on our Bandcamp page, which seems like the best way to disseminate free high-quality MP3s now that our MySpace is basically pointless. Additionally, we have a Facebook, because that's the style these days, and in turn, we have a ReverbNation account so that we can post songs on our aforementioned Facebook page. Then there's Twitter, which I can't figure out a good use for at all, and the Big Cartel site, which seemed to have a purpose, but now the damn Bandcamp has a shopping cart . . . And of course there's our YouTube page, which doesn't get updated nearly as often as it should. Perhaps videos of Bert and I smoking bongs in our underpants are in order?

Honestly, I only have myself to blame. I kinda went into some kind of pot-induced-website-sign-up-frenzy.

Speaking of people in their underpants, while I was on my website-sign-up-frenzy, I joined a site called Punkrockers.com without really looking at it first. Upon closer examination, I realized that it was fucking stupid. I should've realized that it was fucking stupid at the outset when I saw that the name of the site was "Punkrockers.com" but I was in that aforementioned website-sign-up-frenzy. (Hence the Songkick, Bandcamp, Last.fm, Twitter, all that shit - I know, I'm a dork.)

The predominant feature of the site was a "models" section which basically consisted of "punk" looking girls vamping for the camera in their skivvies. If that's your bag, that's fine, but it's a little too "Punk Rock Maxim" for me. What's the point of all this punk rock bullshit if we just act the same as the mainstream, albeit with a bit more piercings and hair dye? Why is there a model rating system similar to Hotornot.com on a supposedly "punk rock" website? Philisophical questions, to be sure. Phrases like "objectification," "sexism," and "the final paper from my Women and Gender Studies class" come to mind. (I can hear the peanut gallery already - "Don't you like girls, faggot?" Go back to the locker room, jock-o.)

Anyway, I finally managed to delete our Punkrockers.com account, so I guess we're not punk rockers anymore. Too bad, so sad.

Beyond that, I think it's better when girls are in bands, as opposed to when girls pose in their underpants for bands. Punk rock and hardcore are often way too much of a straight-white-boy-sausage-fest, and I'm fucking sick of it. I went to an all-boys Catholic high school, and it fucking sucked. I grew up in the lily-white southwest suburbs of Chicago, and it fucking sucked. Why in the hell would I want to participate in an all-boy, lily-white music scene? Chances are it'll fucking suck.

This is why I must find awesome female-fronted bands like the Scabs and the Outs and get them to play shows with us. Fenced is a local act comprised entirely of young punk rock ladies - I was thinking of asking them if they'd like to record an EP with Bert and I in the basement. (Side note - they just broke up. Bummer.) Of course, that's not to neglect the awesome Latino hardcore scene right in my own backyard. Sin Orden are head number one motherfuckers in that regard, at least in my mind. They carry the banner for Los Crudos, and Gordo, their drummer, is a righteous dude who also plays in Kontaminat. I'd love to play with some Latino bands again. After that, we'll find some politically-conscious black rappers. There has to be a few in Chicago, right? I dug on some tracks by BBU ("Chi Don't Dance" is a fucking jam) but they've gotten a bit out of our league, celebrity-wise, I think.

Anyway, this rambling rant has gone on long enough. At the very least, stay tuned for a picture of Bert and I smoking a bong in our underpants.

Stay tuned for Friday's post, when I talk about this:




















See that? At the bottom? Listed next to independent media darlings Trash Talk and Fucked Up? That's right. It's us.

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